To every thing there is a season. . .

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that
which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;"

Ecclesiastes 3:1-4

Roland always edges around the headstones every time we come to visit. It is one small thing that

he can do for those he loves so dearly.

  

Laurie's grave lies just next to this tree. 

When we left Washington, 8 years ago, it was just planted. 

Now it gives shade for me to sit under when I come and visit. 

It is a nice addition to the area and offers an added tranquility that I appreciate.

"I will turn their mourning into joy, and will comfort them, and make them rejoice from the sorrow."
Jeremiah 31:13

 

It is never an easy thing to do--to visit the gravesite of one's child, mother, nephew, loved one. But it is something that must be done. I never come to this place that I do not leave with a tear-stained face and an increased feeling of peace. It is always a spiritual experience and God never fails to give me hope, perspective, strength. I find my heart filled with His love and His grace with each visit. How can I stay away? I cannot.

This day, as Roland and I tended to the headstone of our daughter and gave what little earthly service we could render, my heart broke as I considered that this is all we can do for her while here in this mortal life. I do not get to hug her after she has had a hard day at school, or help her with her homework, or pick her up after she has fallen. I do not get to help her pick out her new school supplies, or drive her to school when she has missed the bus. I do not get to do any of the many daily, mundane tasks that I am privileged to do for my other children. I can only come to her grave once a year and clean off her headstone.

But then the Spirit whispered to me, "Everything you do is for her. Every righteous choice. Every scripture studied. Every prayer offered. Every time I do something "right" . . . it is for her as well as for every one of my children."

How grateful I am for the Plan of Salvation. To know that this life is not all there is. That this life is designed to prepare me for something so beautiful and fabulous, I cannot even begin to comprehend it. I am grateful for the seasons that I have had in my life and continue to have. I am grateful for the experiences that have been for my good and have taught me how very much Heavenly Father loves me. Though I could never choose to have such trials, I am grateful for them and for the perspective that I have gained because of them.

With all my heart, I love and miss my sweet, sweet Laurie Ann. And with all my heart, I know I will hold her in my arms again.